Remembering Liam

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In 2005 Liam spent about a month as a voluntary worker on my brother and sister-in-law's organic farm in Dorset, England.  He visited David and Jyoti and their four daughters again in the spring of 2010.  My family and I planted a sweet chestnut tree in July 2011 on the farm in Liam's honor.  It will grow to about 15' and sits on the edge of a three-year-old apple orchard, looking down towards the sea.  Liam loved this place.
Garry, Nancy, Lucy, and Elliot Saltmarsh

Most of the bus' interiors have now been removed. One item that we couldn't figure out what to do with was his shoes. Liam's family donated all of his clothing that was in good condition, but these shoes were very old. Valerie had the idea of liberating the shoes by hanging them in the power lines. I don't really know the story behind why people do this, but it seemed fitting given the situation, so we headed out with some friends to meet some other friends over by Krog tunnel. I had to make sure that we could get them up there before the sun totally set. It was funny to continually throw the shoes at the power line and miss, time and again ... especially because several people we knew drove past. Finally, Cameron drove by, stopped and he was the eventual winner of the toss-the-shoe game. In the end, we had to slightly compromise, because the first wire we chose was too high, but in the end, I think the shoes couldn't be placed better. Look out for them as you enter/exit Krog Tunnel (on the CabbageTown/south side).

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This excerpt (click to listen) is a clip from the last really big show we had here at the BigHouse.  I was recording the bands that night and Liam came over to keep me company,  He would usually come in, sit down next to me huddled away in the back corner with all of my gear, and just kinda bask in the fact that we were documenting and capturing what was going on.  This night though he sat there for a little while and then asked me if he could go up and read something between the Buffalo Bangers and the headliner Reptar,  I said, "sure" and just had him get the okay from the bands,  He had a book that he was reading at the time about Little 5 points during the 70's and decided he wanted to get up there and read an excerpt from it.  He was so excited, no surprise, one of the many things that made Liam so great is that you could always tell when he was excited about something which was non-stop all the time in ever single succulent moment.  So, he got up there and read, I was getting up to kinda take a break and thought,"hit record dummy, that's your brother, he will want a copy", so I did, and I am so glad I did.  It kinda comes in a little late because I seriously was not going to record it since my computer kept saying I had limited memory, (it's completely broken now :-p).  You will hear the banter of people and general silly stuff shouted during Liam's reading but don't worry they all loved it, and Liam just wanted it to kinda be something happening in the background, we actually talked about that.  I hope all of you are keeping Liam in your thoughts daily and keeping his message strong at heart, I know I am, and if you guys ever need to stop by the house or anything to visit the bus or just for family support or whatever just let us know.  Peace, love, and unity.

Liam's lunch lady friend enlarged one of his drawings and wheat-pasted it onto a wall in Little Five Points. Here's a photo of it. Thanks!

Liam stayed with me for a few weeks around May Day in Berlin, 2009. I suppose that's when I first really got to know him. Before that we were more like classmates, maybe going to parties & clubs (not night clubs, but GaTech lectures and such), but it wasn't until Berlin that I'd like to think we became good friends.

So, these first three photos are from Berlin, I dont take many pictures of people, just of artwork and reference imagery for my own work. The fist one is a quick portrait I did of Liam as we were dangling from the train tracks above a street in Kreuzberg where I lived at the time. It's not the only portrait I did of him but it's the only one I have a photo of at the moment. And as with most of my art it's temporary, on garbage, walls, things like that.  The second is of a tag, plastine is ... well, we thought it was funny at the time. And since he was in Berlin for mother's day (at least it was mother's day for the germans) on a cold and horibly wet and raining night at 1 or two in the morning a flower was painted for moms everywhere. I do not remember if I forgot to give him this image or what, but here it is anyway. Happy belated mom's day 2009. Well, as weird as that might be as far as photos go, that's kind of how I am.

While in Berlin he gave me copies of all his permaculture data. I believe that some weeks after he left me his computer (and maybe hard drive) were stolen. I do not remember if I got that data back to him, but if any one would like, I will try my best to let you copy it when I'm in the US.

Also there we watched what he and I thought was the best movie ever. Perhaps it still is. But if he hasn't recommend it to you I'll go ahead and do so, you can find it on Youtube. It's called "the beautiful green" it's in french with english subtitles.

I guess we all have many more stories to share, but I will have to delay them until later.Ｉam currently somewhere near Nanjing, wish Iｃｏｕｌｄ　have been there, I will go when I am back and watch the videos when internet access is not so limited. Sending only good thoughts and love from me to you all.

 you can contact me at stuffedanimalbrigade AT gmail DOT com

 Liam was the physical embodiment of my hope for this world, and definitely a strong symbol for all things bright and beautiful on this earth. I never told him that, but he was and will always be in my mind when I see the things that I see and do not tell others about for fear of depressing them. He was a remedy for me, a hope.  Each man can say right off when seeing her lights, that the charm Cam Sex babe Alexa pictured here is among those wild web cami girls in Webcam Sex chat. Although I have not met them, I pray there are many others like him, we're going to need them. I, for my part and on behalf of the entire earth, I know that his presence will be dearly missed.

-2011, June 23, Somewhere on the outskirts of Nanjing, China

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For many years, awakening the monster was quite the family tradition. For those of you that have received 5:00AM emails from me, you will find it hard to believe that I was not always an early riser... but with kids, this all changes. Liam was the instigator, with his sister Jennifer being his second in command. In they would charge, each Saturday and Sunday, @ around 6:00AM, to awaken the aforementioned "monster" (AKA, daddy) They would jump into bed between Linda and I, Liam bracing himself with his back against "she who must be obeyed" and his feet on my back, with Jennifer jumping between a similar position and one of general taunting. Push, puush, puuuush was the cry, as they attempted to role me to my fate on the floor!! Ahhh, but the monster was strong, and did not wish to sleep on the floor, so Liam would then tickle, Jen would jump, Linda and I would laugh, and general mahem would ensue for the next 15 minutes. Quite the excercise, I can tell ya...

But eventually the monster would fall, Liam and Jen would shout and cheer @ their victory, and pancakes would be made... 

I guess Liam spent a lot of his 23 years pushing, and puuushing and puuuuushing, but against different types of monsters, and hopefuly we will all continue to push in memory of my boy.

Ian Rattray

I've known Liam's family since they first came to this country.  I meet Ian and Linda when Ian and I worked together at an architectural firm.  This was when Liam was about 5 and we were all living in Houston.

Ann Otterness

This is a short gchat conversation Liam and I had on May 16, 2011. He was in the final days of finishing his grant proposal with Georgia Tech Research Institute (GTRI) and Truly Living Well (TLW) for a project called the "Green Phoenix Initiative". Liam edited the Seal of Atlanta; he replaced the fire with a peach tree:

--------------------------------------

9:20 PM Liam: hiya!
  i just finished a little graphics work

. ( cathuhhrine) wrote, @ 2010-06-27 11:19:00

 yesterday

Woke up, supremely disoriented, after coming home from a nearly puke-inducing bike ride during rush hour on Friday afternoon and decided to sleep for just an hour, which actually ended up being 14 hours and now I write these strange sentences with no regard for grammar. I rode my bike to the Euclid Yacht Club in Little Five Points (grungy dive bar with ironic name in ye olde hipster central). I watched the Ghana vs. US game on the bar's television with Sandy, Nathan, Iuval, Liam, and L5P's usual mix of hipsters n' queer folk. The whole bar was screaming, banging on tables, making a ton of noise, yet still complaining about the vuvuzelas. I wished I had a kazoo. After watching sportz, biked to the ArkFab house with Liam to meet the goats! Liam and Iuval just got a mother goat and baby goat. They were adorable and made me think it was like being on the internet, except in real life (cute animals). Liam has been building the ArkFab biolab, which started out as a pile of wood we dumpstered from my building and has evolved into biopatio, bioporch, and now it is sort of an open air bioshack. Ignoring how flammable it is, it is pretty amazing. I bought ArkFab a fire extinguisher.

Liam's friend Nikita came by to see the land. He's a comedically stereotypical Russian (name, face, accent, wearing a shirt that said "CCCP", communist) who likes to farm, but has studied economics and plans to "make a lot of money and give it away". He just got a job as something like an investment banker, but has some downtime before that starts, so wants to farm with ArkFab. We wandered around for a while, then Nikita left and a few hours later, Cafrinko/Frank and Martin stopped by for similar hanging out. Iuval cooked up some vegetables that they grew and we set a fire in the back field. We stared at the fire, Martin played a bunch of songs on a guitar and talked about the album someone paid to have him record last month, a drunk man whose name I can't remember, but with whom Iuval has apparently bonded stopped by and sang a lot of old southern field hollers. Fireflies, smoke, Liam was wearing a red shirt with a big heart drawn on it in Sharpie because he is adorable, Frank talked about someone writing a fake check where she worked, Liam and Martin talked about the Reds vs. Blacks (Communists vs. Anarchists) soccer games in which they play (Martin is a red, Liam is a black), Iuval and I talked about building Tesla coils (I've built a small one, he's built one the size of a pickup truck), evening cooled down, city light pollution, mosquitos, baby goat, wonky-looking teenage chickens, slurred speech from the man whose name I can't recall, bike ride. I feel okay.

Actually, I do have more to say. Yesterday was really nice, as most things have been lately. On Thursday, Brian and I filmed an interview with a medical doctor (Jiten) who has made this: http://www.usablehealth.com/ Immediately after filming, we packed up our gear, dropped it off in a huge, super corporate, sterile, stainless steel building in Midtown where Brian has an office ten floors up, ran across the street to the place where Brian has lunch every day (and where Jiten has apparently installed a Usable Health kiosk) to get dinner, then biked north to meet Nathan, Val, and Liam at the movie theater. Val and Liam had apparently made their own plans to get coffee at Octane while Brian and I were filming, which was neat. I'm glad they spent time together. I do wonder if both of them get frustrated with how much time Brian and I devote to our film projects. We stood outside the theater, in the middle of a crowded downtown area, across the street from a police officer, and talked into Brian's walkie talkie like spies.

Then, we went into the strange movie theater, but the person taking the tickets told Brian he couldn't bring his huge, obvious brown bag full of outside food inside, so he and I went into the elevator for approx. 15 seconds, stuffed the brown bag into my backpack, walked out and handed our tickets to the same person, who just laughed at us. Then, we went to see Splice, which was a hilariously lame biopunk film with Adrien Brody (who can do no wrong). We walked in late, talking, sat in front, ate delicious-smelling food, and laughed through the entire movie. Fortunately, everyone in the theater seemed to be on the same page. The people directly behind us yelled at the screen through the whole movie: "Awww heeellll nahhhhh! He is NOT going to do AWWW HEEEELLLL NAHHHHH HE DIDN'T!!!!" It is cute how Liam holds my hand in the theater and winks at me. After the movie, we walked across the street and drank expensive liquor while gawking at the strange events unfolding around us, namely the giant screen onto which ABBA music videos were being projected. Finally, we sped through Midtown on our bikes, zooming through the valet drop-off areas of fancy hotels, circling around the luxury cars and corporate folk.

Liam is nothing but a wonderful, brilliant, productive, beautiful human. All of this is silly. I wouldn't write about it, but I love him so much that I thought I'd document it. I'll be in and out of various doctors' offices all day Monday and Tuesday to make sure my brain still isn't going to explode from my brain injury a few months ago. Everything isn't perfect; there are things like this in my life. But, I do feel okay.

c@

I last saw Liam about a month or so ago when he came by the Decatur Farmers Market. He told me about the mushroom production plans he was working on. I offered to share with him some different mycelium I got from Paul Stamets a few years ago. It makes me very sad that this will never come to pass. I was looking forward to working with him on this. Yesterday I went to Honey Creek to pay my respects. I brought with me a log that I inoculated with oyster mushroom mycelium. I pulled back the leaves covering the grave and there was already mycelium running thickly through the leaves. I thought, wow, Liam has some powerful mojo to stimulate that kind of action in such a short time! (we know he does right?) I found out this morning that some people had spread some mushroom spawn on the grave at the funeral. Great job y'all it is doing its job. I placed the mushroom log on top of Liam's grave and offered up this prayer. Oh mighty mycelium run deep into the earth Take your nourishment from the physical remains of Liam Rattray Spread his essence throughout this forest May your spores travel across space and time Sharing Liam's spirit far and wide Blessed Be

Liam running around the Living Walls conference with his tiny wineglasses and flask of home-made wine.

He offered to drive my cat back from Catherine's place on his motorcycle; I seriously considered it, then thought better on visualizing it (not. happy. cat.).

I still have garbage bags in my car from the time Catherine and I were giving Liam a ride somewhere and thought he had scabies, so we made him sit on them. Sooo dejected. Then we thought he had spotted fever from the fleas that had infested Catherine's house at the time, instead. Nope, scabies.

I was lucky enough to meet Liam for the first time almost 7 years ago when he came to work for me at Alon's Bakery in the Highlands.  He was the youngest member of my staff at the Cheese counter, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't have my concerns having been a young man myself once upon a time.  In his first month there he called in sick on a weekend...to go play at a ska show.  As this wasn't entirely unexpected, we moved forward with the regular admonitions that comprise faux sickness and continued upon our merry way. Then it happened again.  

Looking back, at that time I never would have expected such a radical change in demeanor and focus. Fast forward from adventures in retailing farmstead cheese a few years to a sunnier locale where a few farmers are trying to setup some tents and find an outlet to plug in a few power-cords in front of an Ace Hardware on a hot Thursday, and there's Liam making his way up hill with a cart heavily laden with supplies.  His long, brown hair pulled back and secured beneath a bandana to reveal a grin the size of a mailbox, he's breaking a sweat before I've even gotten started unloading my truck. He'd quit the band, he was tearing up the course work in school, and he was ready to change your life.

Like a cyclone with a purpose, Liam would sweep people up and leave smiles in his wake. He was driven, and you couldn't help but feel the same determination when he got to talking about everything he'd just gotten his hands into this week.  Simply listening to him tell me about his long bike ride over from the University to be in EAV for the market would make me want to go purchase, and then ride a bike.  A simple  "Have you seen these raised garden beds? They blah blah blah blah..." would leave you wanting for $50 in wood & nails and a day off to make it work.  The market always seemed a little bit gloomier on the days that Liam wasn't around as I always looked forward to our conversations during setup. Whether it was about chili cook-offs, sustainability, or something entirely unrelated, it was always engaging.

If you were to ask me 3 years ago to name a friend or aquaintance under the age of 40 that I thought most likely to succeed in their endeavors, I would have said Liam Rattray. I'd say the same today. He had more to give than anyone else I knew, and whether you shared his visions in part or in entirety, hubris aside, Liam is quite possibly the most valuable soul I've met in my entire working life. I'm not just saying it because it's appropriate in this time and place. I'm saying this because it's the truth, a simple fact of the matter. The world lost someone who truly made a difference.  Please don't let it end there.

-christopher gillespie

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Liam ended up the proud owner of several of my weirder articles of clothing. Everything had fringe. I claim full responsibility for the origin of the Davy Crocket jacket and the two pairs of 'Wülfpack' pants, but Liam is the one who rocked them mightily.

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2010-07-05 21:14:00

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Unsigned letter in unmistakable handwriting, addressed in one side of the country and postmarked from the other, further complicates life. Welcome back to Atlanta, my friend.

After three years, there are certain parts of the city where I can go and always see at least one good friend. I spent all Saturday afternoon insulating a rocket stove at the new ArkFab location with a few hundred pounds of mud, along with a slew of anarchists, communists, farmers, and activists. We listened to a mix cd of old prison songs and field hollers recorded by Alan Lomax while we worked.

On Sunday, Liam and I borrowed Iuval's new dilapidated vehicle (half of which is filled with compost) and drove to two Walmarts, looking for gunpowder and settling for a $30 pack of fireworks purchased from a vendor in the parking lot. We sat outside a bar in Cabbagetown with a group of friends and talked to everyone any of us knew who happened to walk by, then entertained a crowd by setting off fireworks in the Eyedrum parking lot before Lightning Bolt played. Instead of very easily sneaking into the show for free like 1/4 of the crowd probably did, I spent the late evening in the loft where my friends live, but where they were not present, but where I brought other friends, listed ideas about what makes a good public space, and stuck the list to half a Walmart apple pie, with love.

Today I drank coffee with Liam outside and drew Agit-prop in his notebook, while he read poetry out loud. He re-reads sections when he doesn't think he's gotten the timing right. He and I wear mostly black. People watch us. I should be more wonderful to him, but I'm not. I wish I was, but I'm not. We climbed trees at the local women's college. He asked me about things I hadn't thought about since I left Mary Baldwin and I couldn't answer. He must think that means more than I think it means. I feel very disconnected from that part of my life.

I think I should leave this city soon, but I feel connected to  it. I don't think I wouldn't be able to build another meaningful community of friends in another city, but I do think I'd miss these ones for a long time. You can never go home, but you can build another one, love it for a while, then leave it, long for it, learn you can never go home once again, build another one, keep going onward and upward, and long and long and long forever.

c@

This was Liam's personal vision, Core Ideology and Envisioned Future.